Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just invented taco cereal.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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