i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
