It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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