Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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