he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize