Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
