Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
