oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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