I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
