Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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