I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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