What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
im about as happy as oj after his trial
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You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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