Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
