it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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