we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
