Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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