coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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