The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize