He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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