So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
