i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
