He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
