well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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