Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
