i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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