Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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