Where did you get a picture of my penis
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
