went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
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