Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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