dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
My ATM looks so different sober.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
