I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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