if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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