This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
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