I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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