stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
