how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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