I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
