Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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