That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
