Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
