Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
