Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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