It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
