we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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