how can u be prego again
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
