you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
