the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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