There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.