Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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