My room smells like vodka and shame
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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